Parenting different Temperaments

Three children. Three temperaments. Three differing sets of needs. I’m a bit tired.

The Hare spent the day trying to calmly negotiate extra privileges. Then when things didn’t go his way he  tried negotiating his way out of consequences. He needed me to be 4 different mothers. One to be firm and consistent; one to give him room to be physical; one to keep warm eye-contact; and one to have a sense of humour. It was like water eroding rock. Hopefully there will still be some rock there when he’s 18.

The Owl spent half the day at kindy. He was happy enough about going,  but not that the others were home. He needed 4 mothers too. One to be quietly matter-of-fact; one to be excited to be with him after lunchtime; one available for boring-cuddles on demand; and one not let him get wound up about separation. It was like I was being sucked of all my emotional juices. I’m now officially a prune.

The Butterfly was his usual charming self. He’s  15 months old. He needed a completely different set of mothers. One to be available 24/7 (that’s a biological comment not a social one); another to gently remind other people to not just focus on him; a third to let him know it’s not cute to draw on the furniture, pull things off the desk or throw the stapler on the ground; but what he mostly needed was a mother to show him how to be  a great person. I didn’t always manage. I needed quite a bit of coffee. Quite a bit of coffee.

They are all gorgeous wonderful people, and I love them to bits. But, I’m going to bed now.

(Should you find this article useful, Koha is accepted, $1 is fine. The button is under my blog-roll. :))


About Karyn @ kloppenmum

kloppenmum is me, Karyn Van Der Zwet, mother of three and ex-teacher. I'm part of a revolution in parenting, with the aim to raise mature (not sophisticated) and self-assured children. I also know some stuff about adults. I have also had articles printed in The Journal for The British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (Children and Young People) and the US parenting magazine, Pathways to Family Wellness, as well I regularly write for World Moms Blog (named as one of the Forbes 100 most useful blogs for women 2012 &2013). You can follow me on facebook (kloppenmum) pinterest (Karyn at Kloppenmum) and twitter (@kloppenmum). I'm also vaguely on LinkedIn (Karyn Van Der Zwet). Thanks to Joe (Mr Hare) for taking the photo. Cheers, son: xxxx.
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2 Responses to Parenting different Temperaments

  1. Alyson says:

    Karyn, you’re a breath of fresh air and I wish I could have read info like this when my kids were toddlers 8plus years ago! Now I have a wise old woman of 10, one lovely teenager and one wonderful boy who, at 12, is trying to take risks appropriate to an 18 year old…you never stop learning, but the trick as I see it is maintaining the energy to make it through the long haul 🙂

    • kloppenmum says:

      Thank you so much for the compliment and even commenting! I see it all as a process, and this blog is a small way to record the rest of our parenting journey – I’m certain there’s still plenty to learn!

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