In order to keep me on my toes, our two lovely eldest sons decided to have Power Tantrums on the same morning. Luckily, I’d had a good night’s sleep and was in the right frame of mind to deal with them. Luckily, they had them one after the other. Luckily, number three son just thought it was hilarious and didn’t decide to join in…
What struck me afterwards was that although they were both definitely Power Tantrums – they could both speak throughout and they both made a lot of noise – due to their different temperaments, they presented their Power Tantrums in different ways.
Mr Hare wanted to take a Lego creation to school and I said, “No.” I explained that that pieces could be easily mislaid at school or someone else might think they were bright and shiny. I spoke too much and repeated myself. In the end I finally realised what was going on and stopped talking. I hid said Lego creation and locked the door, as we were meant to be heading to the bus-stop for Mr Hare to catch the school bus. He sat on the front lawn and told me that he was not leaving the section. No way. No how. Mr Owl, Mr Butterfly and I kept walking and ignored the drama. Needless to say, Mr Hare soon ran to catch-up and told me in no uncertain terms that had I not ignored him, he would not have moved. (Tickling my sense of humour!)
Being of a Hare temperament he had tried using Power and Physical Threats to get me to give in to his demands.
Mr Owl was about to head to kindergarten when I reminded him that his best-friend was going to be away for the day. (Yes, dumb-arse mistake on my part.) He began his Power Tantrum by telling me that he couldn’t manage and went on to tell me about his sorrow. He then went on to drop his shoulders and appear weak and pathetic. He ‘needed’ a half-day; the teacher would make him play with children he didn’t want to play with; he used every strategy he could to convince me that he was overwhelmed and unable to cope. He went to kindy and had a perfectly lovely time.
Being of an Owl temperament he attempted to use emotional blackmail and tried to get me to rescue him.
For those of you new to my blog, it’s important to realise that these two boys are capable and self-assured despite their different temperaments. Also, neither of them was facing a new situation.
The key to managing the lovely Mr Hare was not to be intimidated by his strength and threats. The key to managing the equally lovely Mr Owl was not to buy into the emotional drama.
To reiterate: both were Power Tantrums because they were both able to speak throughout and both used a lot of volume. They simply appeared in a slightly different form due to their differing temperaments.
(The ebook on temperaments is moving very slowly at the moment. Believe me, it is a priority and I am giving it as much time as I can.)